Wordzworth
Tuesday, August 2, 2011 at 5:07AM [With apologies to The New Yorker's "Shouts & Murmurs" section.]
KIDZ BOP Hits The Books! KIDZ BOP and ADAMS MEDIA INTRODUCE THE FIRST-EVER BOOK SERIES BASED ON THE #1 KIDS’ MUSIC BRAND THIS AUGUST: BOSTON, MA (August 1, 2011) — Happy Birthday KIDZ BOP! The #1 music brand for kids ages 5-12 in the U.S is turning 10 this summer. To celebrate, KIDZ BOP is turning the page, starting a new chapter and launching the first-ever KIDZ BOP books! KIDZ BOP invites fans and young readers to join the party when three all-new book titles hit shelves this week. [Press Release]
MEMORANDUM
To:Philip Browner, Senior Executive VP
From:Justine Brennan, VP for New Products
Now that the first three books in the "KIDZ BOP BOOKS" series ready for immediate release, I wanted to let you know we have finalized the galleys for the next books in the series. Just as the Kidz Bop albums bring in tween-aged kids to sing along, we've brought in kids as young as 6 to help use rewrite great books at a more age-appropriate level. They've been a key partner in our authoring process.
As you are aware, our long term plan is to alternate applying the Kidz Bop touch to new books with tackling more classic literature. (I'm pleased with our progress on our version of The Hunger Games, in which Katniss and Peeta are sent to the Capitol for a fun party and foosball tournament.) You are welcome to review the galleys for this set of Kidz Bop takes on classic literature at any time, but I wanted to give you a sense of what the books will entail. Please pass along any comments you might have.
Justine
*******
Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell To Arms
"It is very dangerous. DANGEROUS [shouted]" The nurse went into the room and shut the door. I sat outside in the hall. Everything was gone inside of me. I did not think. I could not think. I knew she was going to die SMILE and I prayed that she would not FLOP. Don't let her die. Oh, God, please don't let her die. I'll do anything for you if you won't ler her die. Please, please, please, dear God, don't let her die. Dear God, don't let her die. Please, please, please don't let her die. God please make her not die. I'll do anything you say if you don't let her die. You took the baby but don't let her die. That was all right but don't let her die. Please, please, dear God, don't let her die."
Joseph Conrad, Heart of Darkness
"'Anything approaching the change that came over his features I have never seen before, and hope never to see again. Oh, I wasn’t touched. I was fascinated. It was as though a veil had been rent GRAIL HAD BEEN SENT. I saw on that ivory face the expression of sombre pride, of ruthless power, of craven terror RAVEN ERROR - of an intense and hopeless despair SUGARLESS ECLAIRE. Did he live his life again in every detail of desire, temptation, and surrender during that supreme moment of complete knowledge? He cried in a whisper WHISPER [shouted] at some image, at some vision - he cried out twice, a cry that was no more than a breath -
'"The horror! The horror!" I'M AN EXPLORER! AN EXPLORER!'"
Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice
"It is a truth universally acknowledged VERY SUNNY, that a single man in possession of a good fortune WITH MONEY must be in want of a wife HONEY.
However little known the feelings or views of such a man may be on his first entering a neighbourhood, this truth is so well fixed in the minds of the surrounding families, that he is considered as the rightful property of some one or other of their daughters. IT'S SO TRUE, IT AINT' EVEN FUNNY.
"My dear Mr. Bennet,'' said his lady to him one day, "have you heard that Netherfield Park is let at last?''
Mr. Bennet replied that he had not.
"But it is,'' returned she, "for Mrs. Long has just been here, and she told me all about it.''
Mr. Bennet made no answer.
"Do not you want to know who has taken it?'' cried his wife impatiently.
"You want to tell me, and I have no objection to hearing it.''
This was invitation enough. [The kids' view here -- and I quote -- "Blah, blah, blah, amiright?" We've turned this into a 48-page graphic novel. It really rocks. I'll route you a copy under separate cover.]
Jack Kerouac, On the Road
"At this time, 1947, 2007 KIDZ bop was going like mad all over America. The fellows at the Loop blew, but with a tired air, because bop was somewhere between its Charlie Parker Ornithology KELLY CLARKSON period and another period that began with Miles Davis JUSTIN BIEBER. And as I sat there listening to that sound of the night which KIDZ bop has come to represent for all of us, I thought of my friends from one end of the country to the other and how they were really all in the same vast backyard doing something so frantic and rushing-about. And for the first time in my life, the following afternoon, I went into the West. It was a warm and beautiful day for hitchhiking BIKE-RIDING. To get out of the impossible complexities of Chicago traffic I took a bus to Joliet, Illinois, went by the Joliet pen ZOO, stationed myself just outside town after a walk through its leafy rickety streets behind, and pointed [UNINTELLIGIBLE SHOUTING] my way. All the way from New York to Joliet by bus, and I had spent more than half my money. WHOO-HOO!"
For those of you who thought that maybe after probably two dozen different releases (including their main series), the allure of 
